I was initially going to just write about behaviour at the stage door in light of some recent incidents that have popped up across my socials, but it has now inadvertently become its own blog series about theatre etiquette in general. Why? Over the past year I’ve noticed a very concerning pattern with audience behaviour and it’s time we all get a lesson in empathy and respect.
Performers may be trained to not pay attention to the loud chewing, phone lights or mumbled chats (unless you’re Patti LuPone), but it doesn’t mean they don’t notice. Many audience members and performers recently have aired their grievances about the lack of theatre etiquette and I completely understand why. I don’t know whether it’s a massive sense of entitlement after being stuck at home during the COVID-19 lockdowns or a lack of respect for theatre in general, but people have been taking it way too far. Want to know just a few examples I’ve witnessed this past year?
- A couple (who arrived late) sat next to me chatting and using their phones all the way through The Phantom of the Opera even after being told to stop by the front of house
- Getting whacked in the head with a bag by the person sat behind me at Pretty Woman with no apology and ending up wearing an ice pack throughout act one
- A parent letting their child play a loud game on their phone when they got fussy during Cinderella
- A group of women having full blown conversations and using their phones during Wicked while I was told to put my phone away during the curtain call (which I did without question)
- A woman trying to record Grace Mouat’s final performance at & Juliet and getting funny about it when she got caught.
- And probably the worst, a group of fifty-somethings drunkenly shouting, standing up, dancing and singing along to nearly every song in The Drifter’s Girl that made me close to walking out
I need to note that theatre etiquette isn’t to be elitist or ableist. I have learning disabilities myself, I’ve seen shows where other disabled people in the audience have been accommodated for, and arguably the worst cases I’ve witnessed have been from the more upper/upper middle class audience members who think the amount of money they spent on a ticket means they’re entitled to behave however they want. Everybody deserves a chance to go to the theatre no matter their background and good theatre etiquette is all about showing basic respect to the people working hard to put shows on including the performers, crew and front of house.
These theatre etiquette tips I’ve written below are about the elements we can control during a performance and make the experience more pleasant for everybody.
Don’t be late
While it’s easy to say “A queen is never late everyone else is simply early”, that line of thinking is a hard no in theatre etiquette. When a show starts as advertised, that doesn’t mean it’s the entry time. I like arriving at a theatre super early because being in a large queue is my worst nightmare, but that’s just me. I generally recommend arriving at least half an hour before a show starts so you have enough time to get your bearings of the theatre, buy any merch and find your seat.
If you do arrive late, you will be let into the audotorium at an appropriate time during the show. Trust me, you don’t want to be that person awkwardly scooting over to your seat and make other people stand up when they’ve gotten comfortable.
TOP TIP: Avoid going to the toilet during the interval if you don’t want to miss act two – that’s when everybody goes.
Eating
Don’t worry, I’m not going to say you should starve yourself in the name of good theatre etiquette. Some of this can be to do with what food the front of house is selling, but eating anything crunchy or with rustling packaging i.e. crisps and sweets, during a show are generally a no-no on the loudness scale. Trust me – performers can hear and smell everything you eat. I eat any snacks before a show starts or during the interval so I’m not bothering anybody and getting sustenance. That is if I haven’t finished my usual interval ice cream!
TOP TIP: Don’t leave any litter behind. Good theatre etiquette also means leaving your seat as tidy as you can for the next audience members who’ll be sat there.
Drinking
I know this is a tricky one as there’ll never be a way to fully ban alcohol in theatres. While it personally irks me, I know having a tipple of wine or beer is part of the experience for many people and a big source of revenue for the front of house. However, one drink too many can impact people’s behaviour and end up ruining the experience for others. Just look at the video above from a performance at The Drifter’s Girl to see what I mean.
All I can say is if you are going to drink alcohol at the theatre, make sure it’s an amount so you’re still functioning by the end and can remember what happened in the show.
Don’t sing along
Unless it’s a sing-along performance, you’re encouraged to sing along or it’s an encore (Heck, I like going all out during the curtain call), general theatre etiquette says to not sing along under any circumstances. Jukebox musicals normally get flack for this as they feature songs familiar to the audience, but original musicals aren’t exempt from this. Even if you know the songs/dialogue verbatim, it’s not cool to disrupt it for other people who’ve probably never seen the show and are trying to concentrate. Trust me, nobody wants to hear you belt Defying Gravity out of tune compared to the professionals onstage.
Don’t talk during the show
Mini conversations are probably one of my most disrespectful pet peeves in theatre etiquette next to my final point (you probably know it by now). Having those conversations, even commenting on what’s going on, just says you’re not fully paying attention to what’s happening onstage or you’d rather be someplace else. Unlike a cinema where the actors on screen can’t hear you talking, the actors on a live stage can hear every word. If you do have any opinions, zip it until the interval or when you’ve left the theatre. You never know if a performer can hear less than savoury comments a’la Obioma Ugoala’s Twitter thread above.
TOP TIP: Never heckle or catcall any of the performers. It’s not funny and can be very hurtful as Nicole Raquel Dennis proves in this enraging video below.
The stage and balconies aren’t tables
This is an odd trend I’ve noticed lately, but the stage, dress circle balconies and any other equipment nearby aren’t extra platforms for you to rest your stuff on. Leaving objects such as wine glasses, handbags and bottles can be dangerous as if anything spills or breaks, it could cause hundreds of pounds of in damage or worse, injury to the performers/audience members. If your hands are full, then ask the person next to you to keep hold of your things as you sort yourself out.
Good posture = Good Theatre Etiquette
This doesn’t sound like much, but good posture also means good theatre etiquette (most of the time). This can mean several things, but the general rules are:
- Don’t lean forward on dress circle balconies – not only is it not allowed, but it can block other people’s views and cause a domino effect as they try to lean forward to see anything
- Don’t kick seats
- Don’t take your shoes and/or socks off
- Don’t prop your feet up on the seat in front of you, stage or orchestra pit
Phones
This is a real pet peeve of mine and by far the worst in theatre etiquette. Every single time I see somebody scroll through Instagram, check the time, record a video or take a photo, it makes me want to rip the phone right out of their hands. I know it’s a joke attention spans are getting shorter, but it feels ridiculous when people that can’t keep away from their screens for a couple of hours.
Everybody can see that little light and not only is it very distracting to the performers, it’s explictly not allowed. There’s a reason why that announcement is made before a show starts and it’s not fair on the front of house when they have to watch over 1000 people in bigger venues. If you can’t be apart from your phone, then set it to silent and leave it. You don’t want to be the person whose phone rings as clear as a bell during an emotional scene in Cyrano de Bergerac that took place in dead silence.
Do you have any theatre etiquette horror stories? Do you have any other tips on good theatre etiquette?
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